16 May 2020

Hamlet Monologues Translation

第一段独白 第一幕第二场

原文

O, that this too too solid flesh would melt Thaw and resolve itself into a dew! Or that the Everlasting had not fix’d His canon ’gainst self-slaughter! O God! God! How weary, stale, flat and unprofitable, Seem to me all the uses of this world! Fie on’t! ah fie! ’tis an unweeded garden, That grows to seed; things rank and gross in nature Possess it merely. That it should come to this! But two months dead: nay, not so much, not two: So excellent a king; that was, to this, Hyperion to a satyr; so loving to my mother That he might not beteem the winds of heaven Visit her face too roughly. Heaven and earth! Must I remember? why, she would hang on him, As if increase of appetite had grown By what it fed on: and yet, within a month– Let me not think on’t–Frailty, thy name is woman!– A little month, or ere those shoes were old With which she follow’d my poor father’s body, Like Niobe, all tears:–why she, even she– O, God! a beast, that wants discourse of reason, Would have mourn’d longer–married with my uncle, My father’s brother, but no more like my father Than I to Hercules: within a month: Ere yet the salt of most unrighteous tears Had left the flushing in her galled eyes, She married. O, most wicked speed, to post With such dexterity to incestuous sheets! It is not nor it cannot come to good: But break, my heart; for I must hold my tongue.

译文

啊,这坚硬的肉体即将消融, 融化分散成一滴露珠, 如果不是永生的上帝制定下, 不许自杀的诫命,噢,上帝,上帝呀, 这尘世所有的用处对我而言 是何等辛苦、乏味、平庸和没用。 呸,这杂草丛生的花园, 本应开花结籽,却被自然中粗糙 难看的东西所独占,竟变成这副模样! 仅仅去世两个月,不,没那么久, 一国的君王,曾那么优秀。 再看现在这位,简直像拿太阳神与半兽人相比。 先王曾那样爱我的母亲, 甚至不许天国的风劲吹到她的脸上。 天堂与尘世啊,我应该记住吗? 她也许会看上现在的君主, 就像人喂他什么就会对什么有胃口一样。 可是为什么?仅仅不到一个月的时间, 我还是不要想这个吧。 脆弱,你的名字叫女人。 才一个多月,她在我父灵前穿过的孝鞋还没变旧。 她哭得多么伤心,就像丧子的母亲一样。 为什么是她,甚至是她, 啊,上帝呀,一个没有理性的野兽 都会哀戚得更久一些。 一个月之内,她就嫁给 我的叔叔,我父王的兄弟, 那个人怎么能与我父亲相比, 正如我不能与赫拉克勒斯相提并论。 没等不义的眼泪风干在她哭肿的眼睛, 她就改价了,以最邪恶的速度 和灵巧的身段蹿上那不伦的床单。 这不是好事并且来者也不善, 破碎吧,我的心,因为我必须管住自己的舌头。

第二段独白:第一幕第五场

原文

O all you host of heaven! O earth! what else? And shall I couple hell? O, fie! Hold, hold, my heart; And you, my sinews, grow not instant old, But bear me stiffly up. Remember thee! Ay, thou poor ghost, while memory holds a seat In this distracted globe. Remember thee! Yea, from the table of my memory I’ll wipe away all trivial fond records, All saws of books, all forms, all pressures past, That youth and observation copied there; And thy commandment all alone shall live Within the book and volume of my brain, Unmix’d with baser matter: yes, by heaven! O most pernicious woman! O villain, villain, smiling, damned villain! My tables,–meet it is I set it down, That one may smile, and smile, and be a villain; At least I’m sure it may be so in Denmark: Writing

So, uncle, there you are. Now to my word; It is ‘Adieu, adieu! remember me.’ I have sworn ’t.

译文

啊,天上的所有天使,哦,大地, 还有什么?难道还要让我呼唤地狱吗? 呸,挺住,挺住,我的心。 还有你,我的肌肉,不要顷刻衰颓, 但助我逆势而起。记住你! 唉,可怜的亡魂,只要记忆还能 在这纷扰的寰球占据一席, 我就记住你! 嗯!从我记忆的图版上, 我将抹去琐碎的快乐的记录, 所有书本的教导、图画和印象, 那些青春和阅历留下的印记, 只留下你的命令永远长存, 在我头脑的书卷里, 不掺杂任何低俗的事务, 是的,天堂作证! 哦,害人精一样的女人, 啊,恶棍,恶棍,笑里藏奸、必遭天谴的恶棍。 在我的笔记里都记下来了, 那家伙也许微笑着,但依然是个恶棍。 至少在丹麦我敢这样确信。 因此,叔叔,你等着我, 这就是我的暗语: 再见,再见,记得我, 我已对天盟誓!

第三段独白:第二幕第二场

原文:

Now I am alone. O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I! Is it not monstrous that this player here, But in a fiction, in a dream of passion, Could force his soul so to his own conceit That from her working all his visage wann’d, Tears in his eyes, distraction in’s aspect, A broken voice, and his whole function suiting With forms to his conceit? and all for nothing! For Hecuba! What’s Hecuba to him, or he to Hecuba, That he should weep for her? What would he do, Had he the motive and the cue for passion That I have? He would drown the stage with tears And cleave the general ear with horrid speech, Make mad the guilty and appal the free, Confound the ignorant, and amaze indeed The very faculties of eyes and ears. Yet I, A dull and muddy-mettled rascal, peak, Like John-a-dreams, unpregnant of my cause, And can say nothing; no, not for a king, Upon whose property and most dear life A damn’d defeat was made. Am I a coward? Who calls me villain? breaks my pate across? Plucks off my beard, and blows it in my face? Tweaks me by the nose? gives me the lie i’ the throat, As deep as to the lungs? who does me this? Ha! ’Swounds, I should take it: for it cannot be But I am pigeon-liver’d and lack gall To make oppression bitter, or ere this I should have fatted all the region kites With this slave’s offal: bloody, bawdy villain! Remorseless, treacherous, lecherous, kindless villain! O, vengeance! Why, what an ass am I! This is most brave, That I, the son of a dear father murder’d, Prompted to my revenge by heaven and hell, Must, like a whore, unpack my heart with words, And fall a-cursing, like a very drab, A scullion! Fie upon’t! foh! About, my brain! I have heard That guilty creatures sitting at a play Have by the very cunning of the scene Been struck so to the soul that presently They have proclaim’d their malefactions; For murder, though it have no tongue, will speak With most miraculous organ. I’ll have these players Play something like the murder of my father Before mine uncle: I’ll observe his looks; I’ll tent him to the quick: if he but blench, I know my course. The spirit that I have seen May be the devil: and the devil hath power To assume a pleasing shape; yea, and perhaps Out of my weakness and my melancholy, As he is very potent with such spirits, Abuses me to damn me: I’ll have grounds More relative than this: the play ’s the thing Wherein I’ll catch the conscience of the king.

译文:

现在我清静了, 唉,我是一个多么不肖而下贱的奴隶啊。 跟这个演员相比,难道我不是禽兽吗? 你看他只是在演戏, 只是沉浸在想象的激情中 就强迫自己的心灵贴近高超的演技。 面色惨白,泪流满腮, 外表狂暴,声音破碎嘶哑, 所作所为都与想象完全一致。 什么都不为,就为赫丘柏。 赫丘柏是他什么人? 他又是赫丘柏的谁谁谁? 竟搭上他那么多眼泪? 加入他心怀我这样的动机, 身负我这样的血海深仇, 他会怎么做? 他定会用泪水淹没整个舞台, 用恐怖的话语劈开观众的耳朵, 让有罪的疯狂, 让无辜者震惊, 让不知情的人迷惑, 让眼睛与耳朵都陷入迷宫。 但是我, 一个空虚、萎靡的混蛋, 无所事事,如同梦游, 该做的一样也不去做, 对长命百岁的国王, 一句话都不敢说。 多么该死的自毁自贱。 我是个懦夫吗? 是谁称呼我坏蛋? 谁敲开了我的脑袋, 拔下我的胡子吹到我脸上, 谁在拧我的鼻子, 把谎言放进我的喉咙, 探入我的肺腑? 这都是谁干的? 凭着上帝十字架上的伤口发誓, 我应该行动,而不是现在这样, 但我像各自一样胆小,缺乏勇气, 也不敢把那个老贼的肠子掏出来喂天上的老鹰, 那个该死的猥琐的恶人, 不知悔改的,堕落淫荡的, 毫无怜悯的恶棍! 啊,报仇雪恨。 为什么,我竟是这样的浪荡? 我,作为一个儿子,亲生父亲被人杀害, 从天堂和地狱向我发出复仇的呼求。 我本当是最勇敢的人, 可却像个婊子, 只会心里冒火,废话滔滔, 像个长舌妇一样诅咒, 像个店伙计一样发泄。 呸,真不要脸!

让我冷静一下,嗯,我听说 做了恶的人坐下来看戏的时候 只要演到他们犯下的罪行, 在那个巧妙的场景里, 他们的灵魂就会被立即击中, 尤其是杀人害命, 尽管不长舌头, 也会用神奇的器官发声认罪。 我要让这些演员, 把一出类似我父亲遇害的戏 在我叔叔面前表演, 我会仔细观察他的表情, 只要他一退缩, 我就知道该怎么做了。 那晚我见到的游魂, 也许是魔鬼,它有这样的能力, 使自己变成和蔼近人的样子。 是和,也许正是利用我的软弱和伤心, 它让这些强大的鬼魂 来欺骗我去犯永久沉沦的重罪。 我有办法可以得出结论, 比单纯相信鬼魂的话更为可靠。 好戏马上开场, 让我来检验一下国王的良心。

To be, or not to be: that is the question: Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep; No more; and by a sleep to say we end The heart-ache and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to, ’tis a consummation Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep; To sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there’s the rub; For in that sleep of death what dreams may come When we have shuffled off this mortal coil, Must give us pause: there’s the respect That makes calamity of so long life; For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely, The pangs of despised love, the law’s delay, The insolence of office and the spurns That patient merit of the unworthy takes, When he himself might his quietus make With a bare bodkin? who would fardels bear, To grunt and sweat under a weary life, But that the dread of something after death, The undiscover’d country from whose bourn No traveller returns, puzzles the will And makes us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all; And thus the native hue of resolution Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought, And enterprises of great pith and moment With this regard their currents turn awry, And lose the name of action.–Soft you now! The fair Ophelia! Nymph, in thy orisons Be all my sins remember’d.

TO BE OR NOT TO BE,(留,还是去,)这就是问题。 哪一种想法更为高贵呢? 是承受无情命运的枪林弹雨, 还是拿起武器反抗,去结束无尽的烦忧? 去死,去睡,再没了, 要是仅凭睡一觉 就能止住心痛的感觉, 就能消除肉体天然遭受的千百种打击? 那真是一个梦寐以求的结局。 去死,去睡。去睡,也许会做梦, 唉,障碍就在这里。 当我们的肉体消失,死亡的长眠开始, 梦,也许会溜进来, 这让我们不得不犹豫。 我们甘愿一辈子忍受各种不幸, 乃是因为经过了细致的算计。 要不— 谁愿意承受时代的鞭打与嘲弄, 压迫者的陷害,傲慢者的侮辱, 自己的爱被人鄙弃, 迟迟不来的正义, 当权者的无礼与蛮横, 有德行的人被缺德鬼们欺负? 如果一把匕首就能让自己销号, 谁愿意背负着疲惫的生活, 留下呻吟与汗水? 还不是因为害怕死后的事, 害怕那片只见人去、不见人还的未知国度, 我们才宁可忍受种种恶疾, 也不肯飞往另外一片净土。 这种想法果然把我们都变成了懦夫, 思想天然的色彩上, 蒙上了一层病态而苍白的灰土。 那些壮志凌云的冒险之举, 也由此偏转了航向, 不能被称为行动。

嘘,安静, 美丽的奥菲利亚,可爱的静女, 当你祈祷的时候, 记得替我的罪忏悔。

2 Apr 2020

Quarantine Diary

Quarantine Diary

(March 13 - 19, 2020)

Hi, there. I am quarantined voluntarily in a local hospital after one day's fever. I have had Blood test, CT, of course, and coronavirus test. Results are awaiting. Pray for me if you are also a Christian. Have good wishes for me if you are not.

A moment ago, everything was beautiful. Wife and the kid were having online class. Flowers were blooming. My father was waiting for me in his car downstairs. And I was leaving home to face my problem of fever.

Thank God. The CT is OK. Temperature 36.7 Celsius. Wish coronavirus test result would be fine.

Had an infusion. The nurse said it's an anti-virus Chinese traditional medicine. Temperature 37 C. Night has fallen.

Well I need to be alone. Alone enough to face the soul of myself. The hospital rooms are simple but cozy. The TV doesn't work but no matter. I like silence. I just need a good, short, and solid rest.

I heard coughs from my neighborhood. Big, long, and happy cough which no one dares to display in the public. But here is the little harbor ready for sailors and travelers. No discrimination, no strange staring, no feeling of being guilty. It is natural to cough, to raise body temperatures as high as one may like. Because it is the quarantine special area of the hospital.

Temperature 36.5 C. The drinking water is cold. I want to have a sound sleep without a mouse’s stirring. Hope it will be true.

the condition in this quarantine area is not good. public toilet, no hot water, no shower room. and worst, someone didn't flush after pooping! though I was not going to use it, I cleaned it. That is my duty because I know who I am. I am a lucky man who is loved by God. I have the flame within to warm and lighten the darkness without. And I am happy to do what I have done.

Got up on 6 AM. A 5-hour sleep refreshed me. The first thing is to browse twitter to see what happened. The USA is under emergency. Went to the public toilet before it was occupied. Afterward washed my hands with a duration of two happy birthday song. Temperature is normal, only 36.2 C.

I came here voluntarily. I had an option of not being quarantined. The SOP is to screen CT first, if malfunction of lungs is found, then quarantine becomes mandatory. But I told the Doc I want to be hospitalized first, then do the medical checks. The CT result was good, which means that they will let me go if I was still in the clinic stage. Why I chose the hard way? Well, I have worried about the possibility of Covid-19 infection for more than 50 days since the day when my sister and her husband came to live with us about two months ago. They drove from Hubei before the whole province was officially closed. I didn't blame them. We are a family. We should stick together. And the reunion of family made my parents happy. I am glad and grateful that they escaped the danger zone. But I still had been worrying the possibility of infection especially to my dear wife and kid.

My father is overwhelmingly better than I except one thing. He was a family-centered man but NOT a wife-centered husband. I, as a Christian, see my wife as the bone of my bones. Husband is the head of a family, but he should take his wife on the highest priority. Wife is more important to her husband than anyone including their children and parents. Man and woman are one flesh. So, I treasure and cherish my own nuclear family more than anything else in the world. Yesterday before I went to hospital, I took this photo of my wife and kid. I know it would be very precious and give me comfort and relief if the very bad things happen.

Thank God almighty! The Covid-19 test is Negative! Just took the second one. 2 Negatives equals homecoming.

Visitors are not allowed. But patients can receive parcels from their family. Sounds familiar. My wife sent me this huge book. It's better than watching movies which will consume time and bandwidth. I really like this kind of old-fashioned book. It details all the plots and analyses all the meat and bones. Reading papers is good. Reading screens is distracting. The World Movie Classics is my volleyball, my Mr. Wilson.

Finally, I, myself become a figure too. According to the official announcement by the provincial government, '433 persons are under medical observation'. And I am 1/433.

The food here is salty, plenty, and price friendly. Two steamed bread, a plastic-bowl of corn soup, fried eggs, and potato chips with little pork, only costs 10 Yuan. It can make anyone full but can’t guarantee the nutrition or appetite. It’s OK for me. I don't come here to spend a vacation. I come because I have been called here. I just want to have my fever lowered and my strength and health back. The medical staff are very tired as an army who don't know anything of the future of the war. They just do what they are told to do. You can't find the morale, confidence and pride of med pros which is often found in some famous big hospitals such as Ruijin Hospital in Shanghai. I understand them. In my hometown only civil servants are regarded as having decent jobs and social status. Doctors, lawyers, are no better than teachers. Nurses are even looked down upon. I have gratitude to all the medical faculty here including the cleaning workers. They are heroes in this special time. I will say thanks to them when I get out of this place.

My kid planted a branch in the yard. In a video phone call, he asked me to pray with him that it may bud and grow. I did it though I know it is against the law of biology. it's 5 AM and I can't sleep anymore. I miss my wife and my son. We are not living for ourselves only, but for those we love and care about also. We reap what we sow. No exception. I have wasted many years of my life to live for myself which is just empty and barren. I planted iron branches and steel thorns when I was young. Being blessed, I met my wife and had my son. Everything has been changed. I became a husband and a father. And miraculously and gradually, I have restored my life of faith. Will the wooden branch planted by my son grow to a tree.? The only thing I know is that I will be like a tree with roots which is my wife, and with fruit, which is my son, and maybe with some seeds, which are my works. I am here for a reason. I am striving to be qualified.

I said to the sanity worker 'Shifu, Ni Xin Ku La' (aka. Master, you are hard and bitter) This expression is heavier and more natural than Xiexie (aka. Thanks). He replied, 'Patients here seldom say this kind word to me. They think they have paid the money, so they deserve it. You are a man with sympathy.' We had small talks on the hard times, the hardship of hospitalization, and the weather. We never asked each other which village you come from, which is the biggest privacy in my hometown because from the village and your workplace, your true identification will be quickly discovered. We both respected the privacy of each other.

Thank God! I am released from the medical observation center - the place where I has been quarantined for three days. I left a thank-you note. Goodbye. Farewell.

When I came back home, my wife and son were giving me welcome by dancing and chanting. I had a hot shower and a sweet snap. Then we went to the yard to play. Since gardeners just cut a lot of branches, he and I played with anything handy. We found some dry fruits looking like golf balls, so an idea jumped into my mind. We collected special branches to make them gold clubs. My kid certainly has a talent. He played an eagle and several birdies. Afterwards, we went to the little garden of my late teacher Ms. Niu and watered the vegetables that she left since her sudden death last year. Ms. Niu taught me Chinese in junior middle school. Once upon a time, I wrote a composition titled My Younger Brother and got a high mark. After I had the honor to read my masterpiece in front of the whole class, Ms. Niu said: “The essay is beautifully written. But the author has no brothers at all. ” She didn't know that the boy I described in that fictional work now were coming true and irrigating what she had planted.

I must rebuild my life after coming from the hospital. Something went wrong. I need to correct them before it's too late. I don't want to make plans and rules, which would be broken eventually. I only make a few principles. Don't be obsessed by cell phone. Keep myself away from SNSs. Opinions are not as important as facts. I need rest. I need recovery. I need a little time to answer my calling from above. Last night I had a long walk with my wife. We talked about the difficulties recently. The Venus is shining in the west sky. At least we have all the stars. I went to bed before 11 PM, which was rare for me. I shut the iPhone down and drifted into my dream despite the meltdowns in the Wall Street.

Beneath the stars, in the woods of our yard, under the branch he planted, my son and I sat down on the stools we took and watched the starry night. He asked me to play a song as background music. So, I played 'Leaning on the Everlasting Arms' on my iPhone. He said: 'Dad, these woods is a blessed land. Last time I found the cross. ' He meant a piece of wood which is like a crafted cross. He continued: ‘Let's pray. ' So, we prayed the Lord's Prayer. He led, and I followed: 'Our Father in Heaven: Hallowed be your name. Your kingdom comes. Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us today our daily bread. Forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. Lead us not into temptation but deliver us from the evil one. For the kingdom, the power, the glory is yours from now to forever. Amen. 'After the prayer, he asked: 'Dad, shall we talk?' I said:'Yes. Let's talk about the future. What do you want to do when you grow up?’ He replied: ‘I want to be an inventor and a scientist. But sometimes I want to be an anchor of entertainment programs. ‘ Like a live game YouTuber?' 'Yes. That's exactly what I want to be. ' The Venus was shining brightly like a hospitable host waiting for the immigration from the earth. I think at the due time, a father and a son will talk the same talk and pray the same prayer gazing the blue star on the Venus.

Time to say goodbye to my hometown. We have stayed here for two months. It's the longest time for me to live with my parents ever since I graduated. We live together and die alone. So, it's a blessing to reunite with one's family though there are disputes, quarrels, and bitterness. Time to go back the urban life, the real one. Everything need to be planned and redesigned. I can't help going home and reading all my favorite books. The life ahead is exciting.